I can be best friends with anyone

..if we met in a different context.

I used to believe that I only become friends with people,
because of who they are.

But this may not be the whole story.

I truly believe that where and how I meet the person truly affects my relationship with her/him.

Because it affects who I am.

Circumstances that increase my probability of becoming someone’s BFF:

-we meet one on one

-we meet overseas

-we do not meet in groups all the time

-we meet in a new environment

-we do not have (complicated) acquaintances

The common denominator of these situations:

I am not enslaved to my “roles”–good girl, good listener, nice girl, quiet girl, shy girl, put together girl, awkward girl, smart girl who doesn’t give a damn

Circumstances that decrease of probability of becoming someone’s BFF:

-we meet at work

-we meet in groups

-we have a mutual friend who I feel ambivalent about

Because I am limited to my “roles” in these circumstances.

These “roles” are only my safe representatives, not my true wholesome self.

Thus, I can befriend people better when:

I can be myself–a girl who can be angry, anxious, complicated, confident, outspoken, sensitive, awkward, confused, who give a damn.

When I am this better Truer version of myself,

I can for the first time see others for who they really are.

Then, for the first time, I can know them.

When I truly know them, I can love anyone.

And if you love someone, you are probably their BFF.

 

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