I have a hard time belonging to a single group.
I always find myself group hopping, as I cannot fully commit to one group.
I think I just stay in the safe place of being a “guest” in any group.
It protects me from dealing with group conflicts, as I just move onto the next group.
I can just stay superficial.
I don’t have to face the real stuff.
Or maybe I m afraid to be fully known by anyone.
It’s a safe place. But it’s too safe.
It’s like staying in your room forever. You can avoid certain pain, but nothing happens at all.
We can’t selectively avoid. When we do avoid, we are distancing both the pleasure and pain from us.
That’s why I m always left feeling alone and foreign.
There’s seemingly no pain but no true fellowship either.
This is so relevant to my life. Great piece!
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Thank you! I m glad you could relate. It’s nice to know that i m not the only one.:)
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You make some interesting points in regards to belonging to some sort of group. As a highly introverted person myself I can say that it is not something that often appeals to me. Yet on some level (like at work) it is unavoidable. I am not close enough to my colleagues to really get that sense of fellowship. Yet I am not at loggerheads with them either. So I feel pretty apathetic about the whole thing overall.
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Thank you for your comment!
I feel jaded about the whole thing a lot too..what I actually want is (emotional) connection with others, and maybe not everyone needs to be in a group to feel connected.
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I’m still such an amateur when it comes to making friends (and keeping them) that I’m not sure I belong to any group at all. 😐
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Being an essential member of a group is still hard for me too.
But sometimes I think thats how I am, and it’s okay as long as I don’t rely on groups to validate me.
Lately, I’ve been working on being my own good friend.
My hope is that this way, even if I dont belong to groups, “I” can be the one that accept and validate myself.
Work in progress…
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